The God Squad

I found the most fascinating website this morning, and by fascinating I mean "it's incredible that people have this much time on their hands!"

It lists the religious affiliations for all the major superheroes in the comic book universes.

I shit you not, go look for yourself! http://www.adherents.com/lit/comics/comic_book_religion.html

It led me to wonder...what would happen if there was a God-fest? If all the Gods decided to have a Battle Royale, and got all their spandex devout together for a winner-takes-all throwdown? Who'd line up on whose side?

Let's see!

The Catholic Canon-balls (cute, ain't it?):
Green Lantern (Hal Jordan)
Green Lantern (Guy Gardner)
Green Lantern (Kyle Rayner) [ummm, is it a requirement for the Corps or sumpthin'?]
The Hulk [maybe you just have to be green]
Nightcrawler
Daredevil
Vidicator
Aurora
Gambit

The Protestant Protectorate
Spider-Man
Captain America
Jade (Green Lantern)
Crossbreed (Image comics team, okay this sucks but Protestants were looking thin)

Methodist Mauraders
Superman
Supergirl (why bother listing anyone else?)

I know, these are all Christian faiths - but God Forbid you should call a Catholic a Christian, or confuse a Protestant with a Methodist. Maybe I'll just group them all together under "Jesus Freaks".

Then there's:

The Hebrew Headhunters:
The Thing
Doc Samson
Doctor Fate (Jewish doctors, imagine that)
Sasquatch (!?!?)
Colossal Boy
Marvel Boy
Shadowcat/Kitty Pryde
Firestorm (half Jew, Martin Stein)
The Atom/Ray Palmer
The Phantom Stranger
Iceman (Jewish Catholic)
Robin/Tim Drake (Jewish Catholic)

Now it gets interesting. Sort of.

The Tribal...umm...Tornados...yeah!Mirage
Forge
Puma
Speedy/Arsenal
Thunderbird
Warpath
Manitou Raven
Manitou Dawn
Dawnstar
Shaman
Talisman
Black Panther
(I smell an ass-kicking here, geez...!)

The Classical Pagan...oh hell. You get the idea:
Wonder Woman
Troia
Hercules
Captain Marvel
Namor
Aquaman
Hawkman
Hawkgirl
Moon Knight
Thor
Valkryrie

You know...I'm sure I had a bunch more to say, but after looking over all this data I just find myself saying...

...why? Why, God, why?!?!