The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.
- Mark Twain
I found myself in the strangest of arguments this weekend.
The New York City subway system is a rich breeding ground for all manner of strange behavior. I honestly believe that you could spend a day riding back and forth, covering all parts of the city, and at the end of the day you'd have enough tales for a book.
I was on the uptown A train this past Sunday, and apparently got there just as a "discussion" began between two other passengers. One - a somewhat largish black male, had been sitting reading his religious pamphlet-du-jour, when the other - a not-so-largish hispanic male, decided that his already advanced state of intoxication was about to drop a level or two. He did as I'm sure any of us would have done - which was to pull out a small bottle of rum from his pants pocket and proceed to guzzle it thirstily.
The first man (we'll call him The Preacher), obviously put off by this, asked him if he'd kindly NOT drink that on the subway. To his credit, he was polite about it, although admittedly I'd probably have let it go and ignored it myself.
The second man (we'll call him The Drunk) was deeply apologetic, replaced the cap on his bottle and stuffed it back into his pocket.
It should have ended there, but didn't. The Drunk then had what I can only guess was an epiphany, and began to question the right of the Preacher to even ask him to put his bottle away. Then began a discourse on the illegality of drinking in public, joined by a debate on the probability of a police officer passing through the subway car at that particular moment, which was then followed by a conversation on individual perceptions, rights, and offenses which may or may not have been perpetrated by the other party.
Now...all of this was somewhat interesting. Distracting, at the worst. But my friend, seated beside me, took offense at The Preacher. "What business of his is it?" she asked, upset at his intrusion into other people's actions. I shrugged. "Well, he does have a point - it is against the law, and you're not supposed to be drinking on the subway. But whatever."
Yes, I was stupid. I know.
"But why is it his business?" she asked, angrilly. "So what if he wants to drink on the subway? It's a public place!"
I was still stupid. "Well, it's about respecting people around you. Sure it's a public space, but that doesn't mean you can do anything you want with no regard for other passengers. Maybe the other guy is a recovering alcoholic, and he's really bothered by seeing this guy drinking liquor in front of him. He asked nicely, the other guy didn't have to do it - he just asked if he would. I've done the same thing when I get women in the morning who come on the subway to do their nails; I can't take the smell of that nail polish in a closed subway car, and I don't think twice about asking them not to."
Of course, I got The Glare. "Well, I just don't think people should tell other people what to do!" she growls, now personally offended.
I started to say something like "get over it", or that "maybe people should be more considerate of other people, then you wouldn't have to worry about that."
But I wasn't THAT stupid.
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2 comments:
See, I really do think the vast majority SUCK. People just don't know how to act in public anymore. Many is the day I've felt at a DISADVANTAGE because my mom raised me right. :)
Half of all the mixed NUTS in this city who astound me with their sense of public indecency, can't even spell "manners" let alone grasp the concept. I shouldn't have said that..but I'm a bit bitter when it comes to ignorance. lol
It isn't hard, people. You don't start up long conversations with a group of friends in a public DOORWAY...or at the top of a damned escalator....And, unlike the Orient, people here DON'T have a neutral response to being shoved into the ASS of the person in front of them as a means of entering a bus or train...
And gosh, one person should not take up a WHOLE sidewalk!! If you're walking down the street at .0000000001 miles an hour because you're actually interested in the scenery, please DON'T walk in the center of the sidewalk and then teeter from one side to the other so that the poor schmuck walking behind you has to dart into the gutter and dodge an oncoming bus just to get past you!!!
Arghhh!!!
And on line at the store. No skipsies without asking. :) These things should be common knowledge. To some they're NOT. And you sometimes curse your own good-breeding when some ill-mannered behemoth is being pushy, loud or obnoxious and getting the right of way just because you'd be ashamed to behave that way in public.
But.
I can't agree with you on this single issue, Eric. {grins angelically} Look, I don't think people should walk around drunk in public. I think it's dangerous and, depending on the type of drunk the person is, it can cause a major disruption. But I don't agree with people getting fined up to their yin yang for anything they do these days.
The law should step in at the point where a person has made it apparent they're going to be a public nuisance, not before. I never thought I'd see a day when you'd have to be afraid to "be caught" holding a bottle of alcohol at a parade or a public event. If that guy on the train was minding his own business and not bothering anyone, what business of it was the preacher's to cramp his style. I mean..really. Come on, now. This is America, not Russia.
I don't want any of Big Brother's henchmen looking over my shoulder, either. LoL
One of the things that makes so many people morally inferior today is their inability to stay out of other people's business! :P
Of course, I'm sure you wouldn't have been stupid enough to say "Get over it" to me, either..but I'd see the BLOG and make you pay for it later on. Lmfao!
If that guy on the train was minding his own business and not bothering anyone, what business of it was the preacher's to cramp his style.
Now...here's a point for discussion. What constitutes "bothering anyone"? Does he have to be physically bothering someone? Or does the presence of an open bottle of alcohol qualify, to a man who may himself be morally (and perhaps, if a recovering alcoholic, physically and mentally) offended by it being put on display in front of him?
Again, it's about respecting the people around you. Just because something isn't offensive to YOU, doesn't mean it isn't offensive to the person seated beside you.
And on a subway car, the feeling of being offended is intensified because you're trapped where you are. You *could* get up and go someplace else, but why should you then be forced to move to another place in the car - perhaps losing your seat - because someone else is engaging in offensive behavior?
I see absolutely nothing wrong with asking someone to stop a specific behavior, if it bothers you in a public place. I've been asked to turn off the sound on a cell phone game because it bothered someone nearby, and while being asked annoyed me I also understood the need to respect their wishes - and complied.
I myself have also asked someone playing a casino handheld game if they'd turn down the sound, because frankly the noise was giving me a headache and the train was crowded, so my options were limited. He was annoyed, but because I respected him enough to ask nicely (as he told) he was willing to respect my wishes and turn down the sound.
Public does not mean, do what thou wilt.
The creed is, instead: Do what thou wilt, so you harm none.
Words to live by, dont'cha think?
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